Sunday, June 10, 2012
Thursday, February 16, 2012
YOU
No, I'm not singing the new Madonna song. I'm forewarning you that YOU (person reading this) iz bouts to get the fun made outta ya.
By this point, I am seriously hoping that your finger is touching your sternum and your face has contorted into whatever shape it is your face makes when you finish saying "who, me?"
Yes. You.
"But....why?"
Well, thank you for asking. Things were getting awfully monosyllabic there. Let's start with backstory, shall we? For startsies, I have another blog. Some of you may know about this other blog. Some of you may like this other blog. But many more people have given me positive feedback and expressed a keen interest in this particular blog than the other. There are two people who really like the other blog, and both of their names start with "A". So, let's just make a gross generalization here and say that people whose names start with the letter "A" are awesome and if that happens to be you, go ahead and pat yourself on the back right now.
Let's go to even-further-backstory. The other blog is a fiction blog of short stories featuring characters from a humor novella I wrote with a friend. And let me tell you what, those two guys are way worse than anything I have said and might ever say in this blog. But you don't care....YOU don't care.
"Still haven't answered my question."
Getting there! You all like this blog better because humans are evil and love making fun of shit. It literally makes us feel better to tear things down with our words and thoughts and minds. We do it all the time. Don't fight it. Don't lie to yourself either. It is programmed into our brains to compare ourselves with everything around us. You know you are doing it when you start a sentence with the phrase with "Well, I am not perfect but...." But you think you are? But you're full of shit? But you're better than so-and-so you're about to rip-to-shreds? Don't get down on yourself because you are a pretentious ass. I do this all the damn time! Like I said, you can't fight it. It's like DNA, or some shit. I'm going to go out on a completely unfounded and unresearched limb here and say that it probably has to do with mating. Still with me? Let's move on.
Jasper and Archimedes, the blokes in the other blog, make fun of everything, too. And they are quite ruthless in their make-funnery. But you don't want to read about fictitious characters making fun of things and people in fictitious settings. Nooooohohohohoho....you want to read a blog in which a real person makes fun of real stuff in real situations. You won't settle for the safety of imaginary mockery. Your scoffage must be legit. And I know you are all just dying for me to start making fun of people. Real people. The kinds with names. Maybe even someone you know. You're going to eat that shit up like those kids with the medicine in Mary Poppins.
Up until this point, I haven't made fun of real people. Or shall we say specific people. Probably for personal reasons. Fear, mostly. Fear of being, in order of how afraid I am of it: slapped in the face/sued for slander/shot at but missed/beaten by a redneck/taken for everything I'm worth in slander case/Shot at and hit in a fairly-fleshy-non-aortic-area/Thrown in prison for accidentally killing the redneck with my mad Kung Fu skills and subsequently getting ass-shanked by an Amazonian woman named Butchie/Shot and killed.
Does it take away a piece of your soul when you launch a written attack upon another person? There are people who make their entire careers out of just making fun of other people. But could they handle being made fun of themselves? In all fairness, I don't think you can make fun of someone unless your comfortable with the same fate being applied to you. But if I'm going to get into the equality argument, I did name this blog "Make Fun of Everything", and it wouldn't be fair, if I discriminated against certain types of things just because I don't think they can handle it. Fair is fair.
What do YOU think? Thought I should ask, since I just made fun of you, ever-so ironically, for the fact that you, like me, enjoy tearing things down with our brains until we can laugh at them. Is it bad form? Or is there anyone you'd like to see made fun of by moi in the future?
#fakewords: #iz, #backstory, #startsies, #unresearched, #make-funnery, #Nooooohohohohoho, #scoffage, #Kung Fu (apparently fake, according to spell check), #ass-shanked, #Butchie,
By this point, I am seriously hoping that your finger is touching your sternum and your face has contorted into whatever shape it is your face makes when you finish saying "who, me?"
Yes. You.
"But....why?"
Well, thank you for asking. Things were getting awfully monosyllabic there. Let's start with backstory, shall we? For startsies, I have another blog. Some of you may know about this other blog. Some of you may like this other blog. But many more people have given me positive feedback and expressed a keen interest in this particular blog than the other. There are two people who really like the other blog, and both of their names start with "A". So, let's just make a gross generalization here and say that people whose names start with the letter "A" are awesome and if that happens to be you, go ahead and pat yourself on the back right now.
Let's go to even-further-backstory. The other blog is a fiction blog of short stories featuring characters from a humor novella I wrote with a friend. And let me tell you what, those two guys are way worse than anything I have said and might ever say in this blog. But you don't care....YOU don't care.
"Still haven't answered my question."
Getting there! You all like this blog better because humans are evil and love making fun of shit. It literally makes us feel better to tear things down with our words and thoughts and minds. We do it all the time. Don't fight it. Don't lie to yourself either. It is programmed into our brains to compare ourselves with everything around us. You know you are doing it when you start a sentence with the phrase with "Well, I am not perfect but...." But you think you are? But you're full of shit? But you're better than so-and-so you're about to rip-to-shreds? Don't get down on yourself because you are a pretentious ass. I do this all the damn time! Like I said, you can't fight it. It's like DNA, or some shit. I'm going to go out on a completely unfounded and unresearched limb here and say that it probably has to do with mating. Still with me? Let's move on.
Jasper and Archimedes, the blokes in the other blog, make fun of everything, too. And they are quite ruthless in their make-funnery. But you don't want to read about fictitious characters making fun of things and people in fictitious settings. Nooooohohohohoho....you want to read a blog in which a real person makes fun of real stuff in real situations. You won't settle for the safety of imaginary mockery. Your scoffage must be legit. And I know you are all just dying for me to start making fun of people. Real people. The kinds with names. Maybe even someone you know. You're going to eat that shit up like those kids with the medicine in Mary Poppins.
Up until this point, I haven't made fun of real people. Or shall we say specific people. Probably for personal reasons. Fear, mostly. Fear of being, in order of how afraid I am of it: slapped in the face/sued for slander/shot at but missed/beaten by a redneck/taken for everything I'm worth in slander case/Shot at and hit in a fairly-fleshy-non-aortic-area/Thrown in prison for accidentally killing the redneck with my mad Kung Fu skills and subsequently getting ass-shanked by an Amazonian woman named Butchie/Shot and killed.
Does it take away a piece of your soul when you launch a written attack upon another person? There are people who make their entire careers out of just making fun of other people. But could they handle being made fun of themselves? In all fairness, I don't think you can make fun of someone unless your comfortable with the same fate being applied to you. But if I'm going to get into the equality argument, I did name this blog "Make Fun of Everything", and it wouldn't be fair, if I discriminated against certain types of things just because I don't think they can handle it. Fair is fair.
What do YOU think? Thought I should ask, since I just made fun of you, ever-so ironically, for the fact that you, like me, enjoy tearing things down with our brains until we can laugh at them. Is it bad form? Or is there anyone you'd like to see made fun of by moi in the future?
#fakewords: #iz, #backstory, #startsies, #unresearched, #make-funnery, #Nooooohohohohoho, #scoffage, #Kung Fu (apparently fake, according to spell check), #ass-shanked, #Butchie,
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)